Some things get better with age. Cheese, liquor, staying at home on weekends..But what about the dating scene? How does it look in your 30s? Is it better, or does it just stay the same, like Keanu Reeves.
For an inside look at dating at the ripe old age of 30, here are some men’s perspectives on the matter:
- John from Manchester, 36.It’s a lot more lonely than television, or even other guys make it out to be. "Most of my friends are in long-term relationships” says John. “You can find yourself alone and men are terrible at asking for help or surrounding themselves with friends." He himself is lucky to have friends who he can share his feelings with but he can see why so many men deal with male midlife depression, which is very common between the ages of 35 and 50. “There's a perverse sense that men should be lone wolves who shouldn't engage with their emotions,” he says.
- Eliot from London, 30.He’s not actively looking for a relationship, but he’s still open to it. Although he says finding a real connection in the age of apps is increasingly difficult. “Being able to 'connect' with so many people [...] seems to have ruined something,” he says.”People are so fast-paced, they’re texting lots of different people at once [...] It can make you feel insecure."
- Dean from Wimbledon, almost 30. "People seem to think that the same pressures put on women to settle down aren’t there with men," says Dean, a travel consultant. But the pressure is there and he also feels like men are treated as disposable. Just a month ago, Dean went on a third date with someone and they ghosted him. "I’m not a bad person or offensive or anything, and we seemed to get on well. But she walked out halfway through.” He blames dating apps for the shift in decency. He notes, “The impersonal nature of apps means you don’t have to be polite. Human decency is a little lost, there."
The men all seem to agree there are a lot of negative stereotypes that get applied to single men in their 30s and it’s not the sexy bachelor lifestyle movies make it out to be.Turns out men have feelings too.
Source:Refinery29